Wait on the Lord
2010 was a good year overall. We traveled a lot as a family.
2011 is a year I would already like to be over. It's been rough with issues of the heart that I fear are actually taking a toll on my own physical heart because of the weight of it all. I guess I really need to keep a private journal again. There is nowhere else to get the full relief of expressing the pain and the frustration. I want to scream it from the mountain tops. I want to make people do right by each other and themselves and those around them. Only God can bring that about, but how I'd like to be able to "fix" it on all fronts just so harmony can once again be present.
I don't even know if anyone will read this since it's been a year from my last entry. Please pray for my health. Since the first of this year my BP has been consistently high and my pulse rate a good 10-20 BPM higher than it should be. My head hurts most of the time, probably from the bp and the emotional stress. I even suspect the beginnings of an ulcer. Now my mom is having health issues. That adds a stressfulness in other ways out of concern. The doctor even asked her if there'd been any extra stress in her life lately. Well, yea.
Sometimes I wish I didn't care so much, or that I could just say, "I've done what I can on my end. It's in God's hands" and then let it go.
I could write so much more, but it's late and I should try to sleep. Though I've done very little of that sine Jan 1. I'm always tired, but sleep little.
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3 comments:
I read. And I'm praying for you. One of my favorite verses when I'm going through rough patches (which has been often since becoming an adult) is psalm 55:22 "cast your cares on the Lord and he will sustain you. He will not allow the righteous to be moved" or as nlt says "slip and fall" I love that it uses the word cast because it gives me the image of someone throwing their cares to God. taking them far from you. I need to blog this instead of leaving you a 500 word comment. ;) but I felt like you needed to "hear" that.
{hugs}
Thanks for the encouragement, Kat. I appreciate the prayers, too. You, Jose and your boys are in my prayers every day. Your card is on my fridge.
of course :) and thank you for praying for us. It's always good to hear that someone is praying for us. Especially in the moments when you feel like your on your own.
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